Kim's Blog

When does helping

I went on a great course yesterday, run by CPAS, about how to sustain yourself in leadership. It was essentially about recognising our inner orientations and assumptions that then drive our diary decisions and boundaries.

It occurred to me that all of us in the room – clergy and lay workers from around the church – are all in this line of work because we are caring types, who feel we can make a difference. That, right there, predisposes us to what I call ‘Mother Teresa syndrome’ which is that we can’t stop helping because we feel it might just make the difference for someone, and we get the positive reinforcement our characters crave from helping.

Even realising that has been a help to me and I can pull back sometimes from offering to come or sort this out on my day off or a weekend. We often don’t get the same kick from helping family – by just being with them – as they don’t treat us like the Chosen One who can resolve all their problems!

All good stuff and food for thought whenever I open my diary. What drives us to add stuff in there, or leave it?

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